Episode 14

S4E14 - "Panic Rommate"

Episode Summary

Spotted: our favorite pod hosts breaking down Panic Roommate, where Blair and Dan get a little too comfortable crossing enemy lines, Serena’s love life crashes harder than a Constance Billard laptop, and Chuck spirals into classic Chuck chaos. Meanwhile, the roommate situation? Let’s just say panic wasn’t optional.

What We Cover

• Dair chemistry that no one ordered (but everyone’s watching)

• Serena’s latest romantic disaster—bless her heart

• Chuck making choices… questionable ones

• Roommates behaving badly

• The hosts’ hottest takes, shadiest comments & most dramatic predictions

Episode Vibes

  • Secrets rising. Tempers flaring. Drama guaranteed. XOXO.

----------------------------------

🎧 Listen now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your pods.

📱 Follow us on Threads, IG & X @NonJudgingPod

🧇 Leave a review if you love waffles and wild plot twists

🔗 http://nonjudginbreakfastpod.com

🔗 http://njbpod.captivate.fm/discord

----------------------------------

Produced by Leif Capicola and Steve Marchion. 

Edited and mixed by Leif Capicola.

The Gossip Girl Theme Performed By Steve Marchion.

Transcript
Steve:

Since he didn't commit felony assault at the

Steve:

party, why don't you bang my ex stepsister? Not ex

Steve:

stepsister. My stepsister ex.

Leif:

Hey, Upper East Siders and all you scandal loving

Leif:

listeners out there, you just tuned into the not

Leif:

judging breakfast pod where the coffee is strong,

Leif:

the waffles are fresh, and and the gossip is

Leif:

hotter than ever. My name is Leif and I'm your

Leif:

seasoned Gossip Girl veteran.

Steve:

And I'm Steve. The newbie, the greenhorn, the I

Steve:

don't know leaf. Where do I stand now that we're

Steve:

in season four?

Leif:

I don't know. But I've been trying every trick I

Leif:

know in the bedroom to try to get you to fall in

Leif:

love with me. Business reasons, of course, but

Leif:

nothing seems to be working.

Steve:

Well, you know that that's just not the way to my

Steve:

heartstrings and fair enough. So here's the deal,

Steve:

folks. Leif has been watching Gossip Girl since it

Steve:

first aired, and I'm diving in for the first time.

Steve:

And together, we are your dynamic duo, bringing

Steve:

you all the drama, romance, and sometimes

Steve:

questionable fashion choices of this iconic 2007

Steve:

series.

Leif:

Bring your magnifying glasses, because each week

Leif:

we're dissecting every juicy detail of the show

Leif:

one episode at a time. We'll connect the dots,

Leif:

uncover those sneaky little, uh, Easter eggs, and

Leif:

of course, serve up some piping hot behind the

Leif:

scenes tea. And expect some iconic phantom on

Leif:

those too, because what's a deep dive without a

Leif:

little drama?

Steve:

And since we are all about inclusivity here at the

Steve:

non judging breakfast pod, there is always room

Steve:

for you at the non judging breakfast table. So go

Steve:

ahead and grab a mimosa, a cup of coffee, or some

Steve:

of Nate and Chuck's special medicine. And let's

Steve:

get into this.

Leif:

Before we get into the episode, we got another

Leif:

email.

Steve:

What is it now?

Leif:

This one is from Mal.

Steve:

Hello, Mal, thanks for writing in.

Steve:

Hello, it's Jaden's friend Mal from Spotify. I

Steve:

don't know where you'll be on your watch when you

Steve:

receive this, but I'm writing it just having

Steve:

finished your episode on season four, episode 10,

Steve:

gaslit. I had a lot of thoughts that were too long

Steve:

to fit in a comment this time, so I thought I'd

Steve:

try my hand at sending in an email. I really love

Steve:

Dan with Serena this episode. Even though I don't

Steve:

personally ship Darina past season one. It's less

Steve:

about their relationship to me specifically and

Steve:

more just seeing that part of Dan. I think it's

Steve:

his most admirable quality and it's why he's one

Steve:

of my favorite characters. That being said, I

Steve:

can't blame Nate for his attitude with the Serena

Steve:

situation, even if it's a little harsh. It's both.

Steve:

Cause I personally don't interpret it as him

Steve:

deciding not to be there for her at all, but just

Steve:

not being willing to forgive and forget and drop

Steve:

everything for her. It's a lot easier for Dan to

Steve:

do that. Cause he gets back way more of what he

Steve:

puts into his relationship with her than Nate

Steve:

does. One of my biggest issues with Serenade is

Steve:

that Nate's constantly prioritizing Serena while

Steve:

she chooses literally anyone else over him. Nate

Steve:

also knows that Serena has a huge support system

Steve:

in place for her with her family, Dan, Blair, and

Steve:

Chuck. So it's not like he's leaving her alone and

Steve:

he has his own shit to deal with. Also, completely

Steve:

coincidentally, and not by my planning at all, a

Steve:

while ago, I ended up both watching When Harry Met

Steve:

Sally and the Gossip Girl episode with the scene

Steve:

that's a direct homage to one of the scenes from

Steve:

the movie on the same day. Not specifying which

Steve:

scene in particular, since you're probably not

Steve:

there yet, but I think Leif will know which one

Steve:

I'm talking about. That was a great day for me.

Steve:

Fantastic movie and fantastic episode. Tried to

Steve:

keep that as short as possible, but rambling has

Steve:

always been a gift of mine. I'm really looking

Steve:

forward to these coming episodes. Cause the second

Steve:

half of season four might be my favorite part of

Steve:

Gossip Girl. And I can't wait to hear Steve's

Steve:

reaction to it.

Steve:

So a lot of some of it's what we said ourselves,

Steve:

for one thing.

Leif:

But yeah, thank you for writing in, Mal.

Steve:

Yeah, we really appreciate it. Keep them coming.

Leif:

We are here to Talk about Season 4, Episode 14,

Leif:

Panic Roommate. The original air date was February

Leif:

7, 2011 and it was based on the movie Panic Room.

Steve:

Another. Another one of those movies that I'm

Steve:

like, God damn m. It's that old.

Leif:

This was actually from all the way back in 2002.

Steve:

I was gonna say. That's like in a, uh, turn of the

Steve:

century, huh Movie.

Leif:

David Fincher, uh, starring J. Jody Foster,

Leif:

Kirsten Stewart and Forest Whitaker. In which a

Leif:

divorced woman and her diabetic daughter take

Leif:

refuge in the newly purchased house safe room when

Leif:

the men break in, searching for a missing fortune.

Steve:

Yeah, I. That. I remember watching that. And

Steve:

that's such a. The way they shoot that movie. It

Steve:

is so claustrophobic. And Jodie Foster's a

Steve:

champion, as per usual.

Leif:

Haven't Seen it.

Steve:

Got to apologize for my rough voice real quick. I

Steve:

was running D and D all weekend, so sorry if I

Steve:

sound a little rough right now.

Leif:

This episode was written by Jake Coburn, a long

Leif:

time story editor, and has previously written in

Leif:

season three enough about Eve and the Empire

Leif:

Strikes Jack and has wrote EasyJ in season four.

Steve:

EasyJ was okay, right?

Leif:

Yeah, that was the one where Jenny comes back and

Leif:

does the, uh, fashion.

Steve:

Thing with Tim Gunn. Right? Yeah, the Tim Gunn

Steve:

episode Empire Strikes Jack was kind of terrible,

Steve:

I feel.

Leif:

Yeah.

Steve:

Enough about Eve. I don't.

Leif:

Or is it. That was the freshman toast.

Steve:

Oh, okay.

Leif:

Yeah, that was a pretty good one, right?

Steve:

The Vanessa, uh, versus Blair. Yeah, I actually. I

Steve:

like that one guy.

Leif:

And it was directed by our favorite Brat pack

Leif:

member, Andrew McCarthy.

Steve:

Okay, back for the fourth time. Uh, oh, no, third

Steve:

time. It's just that he was.

Leif:

Fourth time he acted in one episode. As Lily's

Leif:

dad.

Steve:

Yeah, as Mr. Vanderwitz.

Leif:

Then also directed the way you Vanished and Touch

Leif:

of Ava.

Steve:

Yeah. Which were both. Yeah, not great. Lady

Steve:

Vanished was one of my least favorite episodes. I

Steve:

hated the mom so much. I just thought she was

Steve:

terrible.

Leif:

This episode. Spoilers might give it a run for

Leif:

money for bad episodes, though.

Steve:

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Leif:

Why don't you give us that vulture recap?

Steve:

So, do you go to things like this every week? Ex

Steve:

con Ben asks Serena upon arrival at the W party,

Steve:

the second featured on the show in two weeks. It

Steve:

was an in joke for us, the loyal viewers who know

Steve:

that every episode of Gossip Girl culminates in a

Steve:

glamorous celebration. Many of them at that

Steve:

evening's venue, the palace and Laughs were had.

Steve:

But Blake Lively as Serena in what was probably

Steve:

not a triumph of acting, but her natural facial

Steve:

expression looked confused and thrown off balance

Steve:

by the remark, as though an unfamiliar memory was

Steve:

stirring deep within her hair extensions. Yes, she

Steve:

had been here before, she seemed to be thinking,

Steve:

but under what circumstances? I thought the music

Steve:

would be fun, she said slowly, like a short

Steve:

circuiting Stepford wife. It wasn't Serena's only

Steve:

amnesiac moment in last night's episode. She also

Steve:

had to be reminded by Dan that her new paramour

Steve:

spent three years trying to ruin her life. And her

Steve:

infatuations with bookish intellectuals of a

Steve:

different class, as Blair put it, tend to be short

Steve:

lived. But Serena wasn't the only one of the gang

Steve:

who found themselves in a place they'd been

Steve:

before. Lonely, Eric turned back to Jenny Humphrey

Steve:

like trickery, thinking it would win him a friend.

Steve:

Chuck found himself on the brink of losing a

Steve:

worthy woman owing to his deceptive fear,

Steve:

trickery, then getting her back at the last

Steve:

minute. And Nate naturally got used for his body.

Leif:

Naturally.

Steve:

Naturally.

Leif:

Even though he's selfish in bed?

Steve:

Yeah, I actually. I was trying to slide that into

Steve:

the intro, and you said the thing about trying to

Steve:

do everything you could. I tried to say, but I

Steve:

need a. A, uh, less selfish lover, but I couldn't

Steve:

get it out in time.

Leif:

We move into Act 1 with a gossip Girl monologue. A

Leif:

wise woman once said that every morning when you

Leif:

wake up, you say a little prayer. After all, you

Leif:

never know what your day may hold. From a warm

Leif:

goodbye to a chilly hello. From quiet solitude to

Leif:

surprise company, the day waits for no one. Chuck

Leif:

and Reina open the episode with a morning quickie.

Steve:

Yep, they sure did. More super awkward sex scenes

Steve:

from this season's Whatever's going On with their

Steve:

Intimacy Coordination is off this whole year.

Leif:

Blair arrives at the W and appears to be

Leif:

overwhelmed by the workload Epperly.

Steve:

Is putting on her and trying to step up and do

Steve:

more, which is the blarist thing to do.

Leif:

Serena checks her voicemail and is clearly

Leif:

disappointed by that. You have no new messages.

Leif:

Notification.

Steve:

So thirsty. Serena. Uh, come on.

Leif:

It's a trope we don't see anymore in TV and

Leif:

movies. Yeah, the loser who has no messages.

Steve:

Yeah, it's a lost arm.

Leif:

You have no messages.

Steve:

Yeah, uh, nowadays it would be. We've been trying

Steve:

to reach you about your car's extended warranty.

Steve:

You have 27 messages.

Leif:

Dan answers his front door and is bewildered to

Leif:

see Ben's parole officer along with Rufus and Ben.

Steve:

Yeah, this was weird because, like, it was

Steve:

discussed in the previous episode, and the way

Steve:

that Dan was like, whoa, I didn't think he would

Steve:

actually go through with. Was kind of dumb to

Steve:

write it this way. It was kind of dumb to have it

Steve:

a weak layover and for Dan to be like, oh, well,

Steve:

you said it might happen. And not.

Leif:

Well, Dan didn't. Was a part of the conversation

Leif:

last week.

Steve:

No. Uh, yes, I know. But then Dan in this says,

Steve:

oh, you told me it might happen. It just seemed

Steve:

very, oh, we need Dan to be surprised. And, yeah,

Steve:

I thought it was a little. I thought it was just

Steve:

silly the way they did it.

Leif:

More than anything, we see more sexy time from

Leif:

Chuck and Reina. Reina ignores two calls from

Leif:

Thorpe Enterprises before finally taking a call

Leif:

directly from her dad.

Steve:

Yeah, it's her boss. She has to take the call mid

Steve:

coital. Mid coital called my dad. Does that bother

Steve:

you?

Leif:

It, uh, doesn't bother me, but.

Steve:

But does it bother you?

Leif:

Bother you?

Steve:

Which one of us are you calling daddy right now?

Leif:

Roll Tide. We find out that it's once again New

Leif:

York Fashion Week. And the stress is causing

Leif:

Epperly to ride Blair pretty hard. Blair figures

Leif:

she just needs to get Epperly's strings plucked to

Leif:

relieve some of that stress.

Steve:

Yeah, once again, Blair being like, wow, a

Steve:

powerful woman needs something. I gotta get her

Steve:

laid. M. The best way for me to advance in my

Steve:

career is to get someone else laid. This is at

Steve:

least. Okay, so Nelly Yuki, right? The professor

Steve:

at Columbia.

Leif:

Mhm.

Steve:

There was someone else, right? Isn't there another

Steve:

one that Blair. Is like, but a man? Jenny kind of

Steve:

has those. Couple of. Has that plot a couple times

Steve:

and Blair kind of has the I need to find myself a

Steve:

man thing a couple times. But yeah, uh, I just

Steve:

feel like she always. That's her. Go to solution.

Leif:

Sex sells, baby.

Steve:

She's not always. I guess she's not always wrong.

Steve:

Seems to work today. Mhm.

Leif:

Although they just talked.

Steve:

Although they just talked. How sweet.

Leif:

Well, Walt passes the home inspection and Ben is

Leif:

being gracious, but Dan is clearly not happy.

Leif:

After the PO leaves and Ben goes into the bedroom

Leif:

to unpack, Dan vents a bit to Rufus. Dan is

Leif:

surprised to find out the whole thing was Serena's

Leif:

idea.

Steve:

Yeah, you just see Dan in this episode, uh, Dan

Steve:

doing his like, broody I'm mad Dan stuff. And no

Steve:

slight to pen. I think that it is until Dan kind

Steve:

of really breaks character in this episode, which

Steve:

I find that Dan kind of breaks. Dan and Eric, I

Steve:

felt, kind of break character in their. How they

Steve:

were written in this episode.

Leif:

Yeah, they should just stop teaming up. They're.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

They seem to lose a lot when they team up.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Leif:

Speaking of Eric, he is waiting for Damien outside

Leif:

the park. When Damien shows up acting scared, Eric

Leif:

pushes Damian to talk, and Damian admits that Ben

Leif:

jumped him last week. Eric tells him not to leave

Leif:

the city yet. He will figure something out.

Steve:

Is the guy playing Damian a good actor? Because I

Steve:

feel he has really good moments.

Leif:

He's respectable.

Steve:

Yeah, Yeah. I felt, uh, like this episode in

Steve:

particular, I felt like he had some really good

Steve:

moments. Like this moment I felt was actually his

Steve:

whole, like, not revealing the information and

Steve:

baiting Eric into telling him what's going on. I

Steve:

bought it, you know, I mean, I knew he was. It was

Steve:

a ploy because I knew that he was up to something,

Steve:

but I also bought it.

Leif:

Yeah. At the Empire Suite, Chuck is explaining his

Leif:

plan to bang Reina enough times to make her fall

Leif:

in love with him in order to stop the sale of Bass

Leif:

Industries. They are interrupted by Blair and

Leif:

Epperly, who needs a new venue for W's event

Leif:

tonight. After deciding on the Palace Hotel, Blair

Leif:

suggests that Nate show Epperly the balcony so she

Leif:

and Chuck can talk in private.

Steve:

I liked their team up. Blair and Chuck both going

Steve:

to each other because they needed something from

Steve:

the other one and both of them needing something

Steve:

that would where it's okay, we're broken up, we'll

Steve:

always love each other, we may end up together one

Steve:

day in the future, but right now we're broken up

Steve:

and I need Chuck to bang my boss. And where

Steve:

Chuck's like, where, we may be together one day in

Steve:

the future and I'll love her forever. But right

Steve:

now I need your help getting this woman to fall in

Steve:

love with me. Help me, Dennis. This woman.

Leif:

And ah, this is what gospel girl has to say before

Leif:

we go to the first act break. Looks like our

Leif:

favorite Upper east sinners just found the answer

Leif:

to their prayers. Lucky for us, their road to

Leif:

heaven leads straight through hell.

Steve:

Aur centers I liked, but why didn't you use that a

Steve:

couple weeks ago when you had the saints and

Steve:

sinners party?

Leif:

Dan goes to confront Serena about the Ben

Leif:

situation and quickly realizes that she has

Leif:

feelings for him. Um, Serena says she hasn't heard

Leif:

from him since the party last episode. Just as Ben

Leif:

calls her phone that she left lying on the table,

Leif:

he wants to know why Serena sent him a bookcase.

Leif:

She will be right there to explain.

Steve:

I do love how Dan's like, oh, uh, course. Oh,

Steve:

yeah, of course. Oh, like. Like you see him like

Steve:

checking all the mental boxes that he knows Serena

Steve:

has and just. Of course.

Leif:

And how for some tris is Serena, man, she. She

Leif:

moves this guy into the loft and then starts

Leif:

redecorating immediately.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Starts buying stuff for him. And

Steve:

yeah. Right after being like, he doesn't want

Steve:

anything to do with me, but I'm going to keep

Steve:

sending him shit.

Leif:

Eric comes home just in time to see Serena

Leif:

leaving. When Dan lets him know that she went to

Leif:

see Ben, Eric is not happy. Without naming names,

Leif:

Eric mentions that Ben beat up a friend of his

Leif:

last week and they need to come up with a plan to

Leif:

show everyone how dangerous Ben is.

Steve:

Yeah, the old Eric. Dan team up. I will also say

Steve:

this though. Connor Paulo had some good moments

Steve:

today too. He, uh, we'll get to it at the end, but

Steve:

he had some really good moments.

Leif:

But yeah, I Love Eric, but he is a loser when it

Leif:

comes to scheming.

Steve:

Yeah, bruh, stay in your lane. You're genetically,

Steve:

you should be really good at this. But you are the

Steve:

Danny DeVito in Twins to Serena's Arnold

Steve:

Schwarzenegger when it comes to doing this kind of

Steve:

shit. Your parents put it all into Serena and you

Steve:

didn't get it. And that's good, Eric. That's good.

Steve:

That's why you're a good guy. Stop this shit.

Leif:

Blaire wants Chuck to have sex with Epperly to get

Leif:

her to lighten up. But Chuck says that he's been

Leif:

off his game lately because he can't get Reyna to

Leif:

fall in love with him. Blair explains that's how

Leif:

to win a man's heart. To win a woman's heart, he

Leif:

needs to find a common connection. Even with the

Leif:

good advice, Chuck says he can't devote energy to

Leif:

her Epperly task. Just then, Nate and Epperly

Leif:

return from the balcony, very flirty. And Blair

Leif:

and Chuck simultaneously get the same idea.

Steve:

Oh, pretty. Nate and I also love. And it's just so

Steve:

Gossip Girl that Epperly walks into the room and

Steve:

sees Nate and is immediately like, oh, hi. Hi

Steve:

there, Chuck. No, that's Nate. Hi, Nate. And it's

Steve:

just. Like, I get it. You got 48 minutes or 42

Steve:

minutes to get this thing together.

Leif:

Eric takes Dan to see Damien. Despite having

Leif:

worked with Damien three episodes ago, Dan refuses

Leif:

to team up with him now and walks way.

Steve:

Yeah, because he's a drug dealer that he teamed up

Steve:

with three episodes ago to help Serena.

Leif:

Uh, yeah, a couple things. Dan's still wearing the

Leif:

Vanessa scarf.

Steve:

Mhm.

Leif:

But yes, the. The writers room has always had

Leif:

factions, but this season it feels like it's

Leif:

straight up fractured. They're like, not even

Leif:

talking to each other.

Steve:

Yeah. Yes. Where is the continuity in. In like,

Steve:

how these characters interact with each other?

Steve:

That. Yeah, uh, you're absolutely right. It's.

Steve:

It's like the showrunner just isn't running over

Steve:

this with a fine tooth comb too, you know? Is it.

Steve:

Who's. Is it Josh at this point?

Leif:

Still Joshua Saffron.

Steve:

Oh, it's Saffron right now. Show is okay.

Leif:

But Sarah Goodman is like, basically close to the

Leif:

same level. And Stephanie Schwartz has written a

Leif:

few episodes this season. She is technically above

Leif:

Saffron.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

So yeah, it's just. It feels like they're not

Leif:

talking each other between. They're like writing

Leif:

episodes at the same time and not talking to each

Leif:

other.

Steve:

Right. And by this time, Chuck was In full swing,

Steve:

too. Right.

Leif:

Well, it's, um, been. It's been from day one.

Steve:

Yeah. Yeah. That. That just occurred to me that

Steve:

this is. This is 2011 now. So Chuck has always

Steve:

been going.

Leif:

Yeah, they started the same year.

Steve:

Okay. Right. Did anything else come up around this

Steve:

time? Was something distracting? Schwartz and

Steve:

Saffron, maybe? I don't know.

Leif:

No, I mean, it was just shorts had been checked

Leif:

out for a while. Not m sure what Stephanie Savage

Leif:

was doing, but, like, yeah, presumably Josh

Leif:

Saffron was number one with Sarah Goodman. Like

Leif:

one and a half.

Steve:

Right? Yeah. So maybe it was, it seems either not

Steve:

talking to each other or butting heads or

Steve:

something going on.

Leif:

Russell and Raina are going through a checklist of

Leif:

things for the board vote tonight as they are

Leif:

exiting the Palace.

Steve:

Hotel, talking about it openly and without any

Steve:

kind of concern of anyone hearing anything about

Steve:

it. Continue.

Leif:

Chuck arrives and offers to give them a real tour.

Leif:

Russell has other business to attend to, but

Leif:

suggests that Reina stay to have lunch with Chuck.

Leif:

He then tells Chuck there is nothing his daughter

Leif:

doesn't tell him. So does that mean she tells him

Leif:

about every guy she slept with or only the ones

Leif:

that could affect the business?

Steve:

I. Yeah, that's. I, uh, was thinking the same

Steve:

thing.

Leif:

Like, how really weird.

Steve:

Yeah. Ah. How much do you tell your dad? Like how

Steve:

details like positions. Positions. Yeah. Clothing,

Steve:

lack thereof.

Leif:

Well, we know Chuck never takes office. He's a

Leif:

never nude.

Steve:

I once again, though, just want to point out the

Steve:

two of them come up here talking out in the open

Steve:

about this thing, and I thought I meant to

Steve:

actually go back and rewatch this scene because I

Steve:

thought that Graham. Is it the dad?

Leif:

Russell.

Steve:

Russell, Russell Thorne.

Leif:

Thorpe.

Steve:

Thorpe. Russell Thorpe. I thought Russell said in

Steve:

front of Chuck, I'll see you tonight. Right when

Steve:

they were parting ways and it was like talking

Steve:

about that board vote out there right in front of

Steve:

Chuck. Pretty much.

Steve:

So, yeah.

Steve:

Chuck knew about it. You were there talking about

Steve:

it in front of him.

Leif:

Indeed.

Steve:

And I am not blaming the character here. I am 100%

Steve:

blaming the writers here.

Leif:

Yeah. Serena walks into the loft apologizing for

Leif:

the bookcase, but also delivers another present in

Leif:

the form of a book to which they have a shared

Leif:

sentimental connection. Ben invites Serena to

Leif:

lunch, but she suggests they order in since they

Leif:

have to wait for the delivery guys to pick up the

Leif:

bookcase.

Steve:

I remember everything you read to me. When she

Steve:

said that, I fucking gagged. Yeah, because that

Steve:

once again, this affair started when she was a

Steve:

teenager. You groomed her. You may not have

Steve:

thought to yourself I'm gonna groom this teenager.

Steve:

You may have been sitting there thinking, I like

Steve:

the attention I'm getting from this person. She's

Steve:

a good student. I'm going to talk to her. Or

Steve:

whatever was going through your head where you

Steve:

were attracted to her when you said to her, oh, I

Steve:

won't tell you. I'm not into you. After you took

Steve:

her across state lines, you were grooming her.

Steve:

You're grooming her. And now she's like, oh, I

Steve:

want to bring back all the good memories of when

Steve:

you used to groom me. Uh. Aww. It's. For fuck's

Steve:

sake.

Leif:

Serena, Nate, Blair and Epperly are walking down

Leif:

the street. When Epperly steps away to take a

Leif:

call, Blair puts the full court press on Nate to

Leif:

get Epperly laid. We also learn that Nate was a

Leif:

selfish lover.

Steve:

Yeah, I really love this scene. I love that we

Steve:

really do essentially have a Blair Chuck team up

Steve:

here. This is those phone calls, right?

Leif:

Not yet.

Steve:

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought. Oh, this is with Eberlee

Steve:

when they're walking up the street and she's.

Steve:

Yeah, she says she.

Leif:

She takes a call, like, walks ahead of them.

Steve:

Yes.

Leif:

And Blair hangs back and, like, hits Nate and.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah. And fuck her good.

Leif:

Nate.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

Don't be selfish.

Steve:

Yeah, don't be selfish. And am I usually selfish?

Steve:

Ah, a girl remembers. And of course Nate's a

Steve:

selfish lover. Of course, Nate doesn't know he's a

Steve:

selfish lover.

Leif:

And it's a starfish. Raina is impressed by lunch

Leif:

at the palace, and Chuck's familiarity with the

Leif:

servers bridges the way to some common ground

Leif:

between the two. However, Reina quickly has to

Leif:

leave for her meeting.

Steve:

Yeah, and this is where he's. They're. They're

Steve:

eating and he's talking to the waiters.

Leif:

First name basis with ever.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah. Which, I mean, it's a good ploy and.

Steve:

It is a sweet moment and I, uh. No shade here.

Leif:

Ben and Serena are sharing spicy tuna rolls, and

Leif:

Ben is clearly under Serena's spell. They are

Leif:

interrupted by Dan, which causes Serena to get up

Leif:

and leave. As she does, Dan reminds her that Ben

Leif:

is dangerous. Serena fires back with a Nunya

Leif:

beeswax, despite Serena claiming Ben was no longer

Leif:

in touch with Juliet. Dan sees Ben's phone

Leif:

vibrating with Juliet on the caller id.

Steve:

He.

Leif:

So I used the same plot device twice in one

Leif:

episode.

Steve:

Yes, yes, they did indeed. And here he is now.

Steve:

Remember last week it's, I don't want that with

Steve:

you. And here he's, uh, feeding her with

Steve:

Chopsticks? Are you fucking kidding me? You're

Steve:

flirting. You don't. The act of putting food in

Steve:

someone else's mouth, even with chopsticks, is

Steve:

either parental or flirting. And Serena's gonna

Steve:

like it if it's both. Serena wants it to be both.

Leif:

Yes. And Gasifco has this to say before we go to

Leif:

the break. Watch out, lonely boy. Your new

Leif:

roommate's moving in fast. But you're the one

Leif:

who's going to have to unpack his lies. We move

Leif:

into Act 3. Chuck and Blair are having a fake

Leif:

phone conversation solely for Reyna and Nate's

Leif:

benefit. Despite Chuck's weak acting, Reina

Leif:

appears to buy the ruse. On the other end, it

Leif:

looks like Nate found a shiny, uh, new toy to be

Leif:

obsessed with for at least five minutes.

Steve:

Yeah, I had something that I was brewing on for

Steve:

this and now I kinda lost my take on it.

Leif:

Yeah, I'll give Ed props for doing good, bad

Leif:

acting.

Steve:

Oh. When he turns around and. Oh, right. Once

Steve:

again, I love the Blair Chuck team up here that

Steve:

they have going on that they're, uh. It's funny

Steve:

because the conversation that they have on the

Steve:

phone reminded me of how Bailey and I talk to each

Steve:

other. The two of us will have parallel

Steve:

conversations where I'll say something about D and

Steve:

D and Bailey be like, cool. Here's something about

Steve:

black metal that I'm really interested in right

Steve:

now. And I'll be like, cool. Here's something

Steve:

about a show I was watching and they won't be. And

Steve:

it was that same. It just made me think of that.

Steve:

Yes. And also kudos to Ed. And I think overall, Ed

Steve:

had a pretty good episode. I think that the acting

Steve:

overall, for the most part, wasn't too bad. It was

Steve:

the writing and directing that I felt kind of hit

Steve:

me more.

Leif:

As Nate leaves, Serena walks up to talk to Blair,

Leif:

Blair questions Serena's feelings for Ben as they

Leif:

clearly fit a pattern.

Steve:

Your mother doesn't like him. Um, he's. He's from

Steve:

a different. He's from a different economic

Steve:

status.

Leif:

He's.

Steve:

He's a bad boy. No, bad boys aren't her thing.

Leif:

But he's an outsider.

Steve:

But he's an outsider and her mom hates him. Don't

Steve:

forget he's too old for her.

Leif:

Back at the loft, Dan is rattling dishes and being

Leif:

passive aggressive towards Ben. Dan accuses Ben of

Leif:

causing Serena to become estranged from her

Leif:

family. This makes Ben get defensive. When Serena

Leif:

invites him to a party tonight, he accepts while

Leif:

staring Dan down before Ben even gets off the

Leif:

phone. Uh, Dan is already texting Eric for a team

Leif:

up.

Steve:

Good idea, Dan. Go do that. Wait a second. Way

Steve:

earlier, Eric made a comment about how everyone

Steve:

confides in him and doesn't expect him to say

Steve:

anything. That just when he talked to Damian, that

Steve:

just triggered for me for a second. I just thought

Steve:

of that again. Go ahead.

Leif:

Do you think he revealed something to Damian?

Steve:

Now I know that they go in and out of who Gossip

Steve:

Girl is, but it felt like they pivoted back to

Steve:

Eric again right there. It felt like foreshadowing

Steve:

Eric being Gossip Girl.

Leif:

What other secrets could Eric have recently been

Leif:

venting about?

Steve:

Rufus and Lily? Jonathan Whyever Elliot broke up

Steve:

with him.

Leif:

Um, those aren't really secrets though.

Steve:

No. Well, I mean the Elliot thing. We don't know

Steve:

why Elliot broke up with them. So that could be

Steve:

what other secrets?

Leif:

You're on the right track. With Rufus and Lily.

Steve:

With Rufus and Lily. There's Rufus, Lily, there's

Steve:

Scott.

Leif:

But everyone knows about Scott.

Steve:

Yeah, everyone knows about Scott. So there's.

Leif:

What has Lily done recently though? Or what do we

Leif:

find out recently?

Steve:

Well, she's trying to sell the company.

Leif:

What else?

Steve:

The cancer.

Leif:

What cancer?

Steve:

Oh, the. She. The fake cancer.

Leif:

Recently. Recently.

Steve:

Oh, recently tried to sell the company. Tried to

Steve:

put Ben in jail. And how'd she do that with the

Steve:

judge? She. Eric knows about the judge.

Leif:

And what did she do with the judge?

Steve:

She paid off a judge.

Leif:

What did she do at the. At the very beginning?

Leif:

That.

Steve:

Well, she forged Serena's signature.

Leif:

That seems like a crime.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah, it is.

Leif:

That.

Steve:

That is. It's a pretty big crime, as Lily pointed

Steve:

out. Like, she could go to jail for this. M. Yeah.

Leif:

At W, Epperly is even more stressed about the

Leif:

party than ever. However, Blair manages to

Leif:

convince her that she can still do her job from

Leif:

the party and Nate is going to be there looking

Leif:

for her.

Steve:

Yeah, and tells her that she'll take care of all

Steve:

the calls. You've got this great assistant next to

Steve:

you, which she seemingly immediately fucks up.

Steve:

Like, immediately. Which here. And I don't like

Steve:

that. Because I do think that if Blair was like,

Steve:

no, you've got to do this thing, that she would be

Steve:

on top of her job a little bit more. You don't

Steve:

want Blair to be on top of her job.

Leif:

This is what guys, the girl has to say though.

Leif:

Careful.

Steve:

Be.

Leif:

Your boss's phone is ringing off the hook and it's

Leif:

your job on the line.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

We move into Act 4. At the party, Blair and

Leif:

Epperly spot Nate and go over to him. Nate asks

Leif:

Epperly to grab a drink with him. And Blair stays

Leif:

back and eagerly urges Nate on.

Steve:

Gives him a good game Pat on his way by. Go get

Steve:

him, champ.

Leif:

Serena and Ben arrive. Both look a little nervous

Leif:

to be on their at their first big party as a quasi

Leif:

couple, Ben offers to grab them drinks.

Steve:

Yeah, Ben, who is here on a spite date, by the

Steve:

way, that is here because he's mad at Dan.

Leif:

Yeah, we're suffering. Reina finds Chuck at the

Leif:

party and announces she purposely missed her

Leif:

meeting to come here. Chuck offers to go upstairs

Leif:

to visit pound town, but Reina would rather learn

Leif:

more about Chuck's childhood home.

Steve:

And this is where she says, um, where'd you used

Steve:

to hide? Right? Show me where you used to hide.

Leif:

Uh, that's when they're in the kitchen, I think.

Steve:

Well, he shows her the hiding spot in the kitchen.

Steve:

I thought that before they get there, she says,

Steve:

because in this conversation, he says, how did you

Steve:

know? And she said, I grew up in a place like

Steve:

this, too. And he says, can I?

Leif:

Yeah, that's in the kitchen, right?

Steve:

Well, I thought right before that. Cause this is

Steve:

the scene where he says. He said it wouldn't be a

Steve:

secret if I told you where it was. And the next

Steve:

scene is in the kitchen where they actually point

Steve:

out the spot. But, uh, this is where she says that

Steve:

he has a hiding spot where she knows because she

Steve:

had one in her hotel.

Leif:

Damien intentionally bumps into Ben and becomes

Leif:

belligerent in an attempt to goad Ben into taking

Leif:

a swing at him. Ben doesn't take the bait and

Leif:

walks away. Eric and Dan were in on the plan and

Leif:

surprised it didn't work. Damien still seems

Leif:

confident and tells Dan to call Ben's parole

Leif:

officer. When Dan goes to do that, Damian lets

Leif:

Eric know that the plan has changed. He wants Eric

Leif:

to punch him so they can blame it on Ben.

Steve:

Okay, Dan, Eric, Damian, what's the plan here? All

Steve:

right, Damian's going to go in and get up in his

Steve:

face and yell at him. Okay, then what? Well, then

Steve:

he'll clearly attack him and be arrested. Okay, if

Steve:

he doesn't. Plan B. Oh, uh, there's no plan B.

Steve:

He's definitely going to do that. Okay, fine. Plan

Steve:

B. Eric, punch me. I. He doesn't let Dan know it's

Steve:

going to be Eric doing the punching. Yeah, he just

Steve:

lets Dan know that it's going to happen. And this

Steve:

is where this all really falls apart for me, too,

Steve:

because Dan wouldn't just go along without knowing

Steve:

a plan. I. Well, maybe he Would, but I feel like

Steve:

both Dan and Eric are now doing things. They're

Steve:

lying to do it, which isn't what they would

Steve:

ordinarily do.

Leif:

Well, Dan still thinks that he's. He's going to be

Leif:

able to get him, um, pissed off.

Steve:

Yeah. Yeah, but Dan's.

Leif:

And he, uh, threads. If you're lying, I'm going to

Leif:

get you banished. Which Dan's out here threatening

Leif:

Bashful now.

Steve:

Yeah, Banish it.

Leif:

One of the other interns finds Blair and tells her

Leif:

that the party planner screwed up and delivered

Leif:

the gift bags to the old location. When Blair goes

Leif:

to find Epperly, she has disappeared from the spot

Leif:

she was standing just a moment before.

Steve:

And here's the thing. Oh, my God. Don't worry.

Steve:

Epperly can handle this. Why does she need to?

Steve:

Okay, let me call a car to go pick up the bags and

Steve:

bring them here. Could any other human being get

Steve:

the bags and bring them here? Does Epperly need to

Steve:

sign off on the bags getting transported here?

Leif:

Chuck and Reyna are bonding over their parallel

Leif:

childhood experience in the hotel kitchen. It

Leif:

appears Chuck is about to reveal his ruse when

Leif:

Russell walks in and reveals that Chuck purposely

Leif:

kept Reyna away from the board vote that happened

Leif:

today.

Steve:

Reina, you knew about this board vote again? It

Steve:

seemed like Chuck would have known and that you

Steve:

would have known. Chuck knew. You're the one that

Steve:

was like, I can't make it tonight. I've got

Steve:

something else I need to do. And then later said,

Steve:

you know what? I can make it after. I'm going to

Steve:

cancel my. I'm going to skip this thing to hang

Steve:

out with you. Why does it matter if he knew? Why

Steve:

at, uh, this point? Does it matter? Yeah, I did

Steve:

know. Uh, what's wrong with that? You still chose

Steve:

me over that.

Leif:

Serena is talking to some socialites when Ben

Leif:

walks up to tell her he's going to leave but that

Leif:

she should stay. Then Eric, followed by a now

Leif:

bruised Damian, will also walk up and accuse Ben

Leif:

of attacking Damian. Ben doesn't deny it, and Dan

Leif:

looks on in judgment.

Steve:

Ben with this stupid, stoic, brooding Ben, who had

Steve:

plenty of anger issues and plenty to say when he

Steve:

was yelling at his sister from jail, is now like,

Steve:

oh, guys, I'm just gonna keep my cool. Even though

Steve:

I assaulted that guy a week ago and no one was

Steve:

looking. Like Damian's also not entirely wrong. He

Steve:

did assault him.

Leif:

And I wouldn't be surprised if Ben was planning to

Leif:

go after him again when no one was looking.

Steve:

Yeah, uh, very much. Yeah.

Leif:

And then this is What Gossip Girl has to say as we

Leif:

go to the act break. Sorry, S. Your new beau may

Leif:

have the right to remain silent, but you just

Leif:

became the talk of the town. We move into Act 5.

Leif:

Florence and the Machine begin an acoustic set. As

Leif:

Serena tries to get to the bottom of what happened

Leif:

with Ben and Damie. Dan reiterates that Ben is

Leif:

dangerous, but Serena says, Ben wouldn't do that.

Steve:

He would, but you don't know. He would.

Leif:

He would, but he just didn't this time.

Steve:

Yeah, he would. He didn't. And, uh, you just. He

Steve:

just makes you think that he wouldn't.

Leif:

Chuck chases down Reina and admits that he started

Leif:

things with her for the wrong reasons, but is now

Leif:

falling for her for real. But Reina is like, nah,

Leif:

I.

Steve:

Something like that. And. Again, like, you're the

Steve:

one that skipped this. He didn't keep you from

Steve:

anything. He asked you on a date that you accepted

Steve:

when you knew you had plans, which is why you

Steve:

turned him down when he first asked. And let me

Steve:

also say this as far as new characters and

Steve:

villains that they bring into this show and how

Steve:

often, I hate them. I really like Reina. I

Steve:

actually think so far she has measured up to the

Steve:

cast in her chops. She's measured up to go toe to

Steve:

toe with Chuck in these scenes. I think that this

Steve:

is again, just bad writing in the. Bad continuity

Steve:

in this episode. But I like her character a lot so

Steve:

far. I've also liked Russell. So far I've liked

Steve:

their characters. I don't find them to be grimy,

Steve:

backhanded, terrible villains. I find them to be

Steve:

people with a conflicting interest to the

Steve:

characters of the show, which makes them more

Steve:

interesting. Yeah, but why do you give a fuck that

Steve:

you went on a date with this guy? Why do you care

Steve:

that he knew?

Leif:

Ben's parole officer is taking him back to a

Leif:

holding facility until he can see a judge of the

Leif:

morning. Serena chases him down and pleads with

Leif:

Ben to tell the PO that he didn't do anything. But

Leif:

Ben still doesn't deny the allegation.

Steve:

Ben, uh, yeah, I didn't do this. Here, look at my

Steve:

hands. Could you check these guys hands to see if

Steve:

anyone has bruised knuckles? Because I didn't just

Steve:

punch this guy. And Eric, you know, I saw him do

Steve:

it. Like, eric, fuck off. Like, come on, bruh. Ah,

Steve:

you're better than this. But Ben, just say I

Steve:

didn't do it.

Leif:

Yeah, he knows no one will believe him. Um, saying

Leif:

you do it's not going to do anything because

Leif:

they're going to believe Eric over him.

Steve:

Yeah. But also, I don't know. I fucking hate Ben.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

Blair asks Nate where Epperly is, and he admits

Leif:

that Epperly went off with some guy that she knew

Leif:

from Oxford. Blair decides it's now on her to fix

Leif:

the gift bag crisis and attempts to bully Nate

Leif:

into helping her. But for once, Nate stands up for

Leif:

himself.

Steve:

Yeah, I don't really know why you needed to choose

Steve:

this hill to die on, Nate. Like, you do this kind

Steve:

of shit for her all the time. Why not help her

Steve:

with the bags here?

Leif:

Now that the scheme has worked, Errik wants to go

Leif:

back to Damien's place to celebrate with some Call

Leif:

of Duty. But Damien callously reveals he was just

Leif:

using Eric to get rid of Ben. Eric is left looking

Leif:

devastated.

Steve:

And here's. Now, I just. I. I think we're just

Steve:

finding this true. Damien of. I'm going to be

Steve:

really good and I'm just going to be a nice guy

Steve:

and kind of chill out and then dip and just, you

Steve:

know, he did it to Jenny. He's doing it to Eric

Steve:

now.

Leif:

Yeah. Rufus finds Dan sitting at the bar and is

Leif:

disappointed that Dan knocked on Ben, but also

Leif:

apologizes for not talking to Dan first before

Leif:

moving Ben into the loft. However, a scorned Eric

Leif:

walks up and shows his bruised hand, admitting it

Leif:

was him that punched Damien and not Ben. Dan gets

Leif:

up to try to fix things, and Rufus.

Steve:

It was shitty to force your kid to live with

Steve:

someone without really vetting the situation.

Steve:

Better to just be like, and I get that your wife

Steve:

did some shitty things to this guy and you feel

Steve:

guilty, so why don't you take some of her money

Steve:

and put him up in fucking anywhere. Like,

Steve:

anywhere. And like Dan said, put him in Chuck's

Steve:

room. Put him in Chuck's old room. Why does it

Steve:

have to be here?

Leif:

And Gossip Girl has this to say as we go to the

Leif:

final break. Uh, spotted a lonely boy trying to

Leif:

save an innocent man. Looks like Brooklyn's the

Leif:

one who's guilty by association. We move into the

Leif:

epilogue.

Steve:

Oh, you said Brooklyn. It made me rethink of this.

Steve:

Why does Blair call Brooklyn Dumbo?

Leif:

That's the neighborhood.

Steve:

Oh, the dumb. I didn't realize that was the name

Steve:

of the neighborhood.

Leif:

Yes, it's right. Right underneath the bridge,

Leif:

basically.

Steve:

Oh, okay.

Leif:

We move into the epilogue. Dan and Rufus are on

Leif:

the phone the next morning. Rufus tells Dan that

Leif:

Eric didn't sleep at home last night, and they're

Leif:

both worried about Eric and his relationship with

Leif:

Damien. Dan says not to worry because he Is

Leif:

innate. Have a plan to take care of Damien.

Steve:

Yeah. Good job. Great. I love a good Nate Dan team

Steve:

up. But it was also like um.

Leif:

Dan gets off the phone as Ben returns to the loft.

Leif:

Dan apologizes for helping to cause Ben to spend

Leif:

the night in jail. Ben is being pretty gracious

Leif:

about it. Dan also invited Serena to come over to

Leif:

wait for Ben. He leaves the two to reconnect as he

Leif:

has to go meet Nate. It also just setting them up

Leif:

to bang.

Steve:

Yeah. Yeah. It's Blair. Dan has that Blair amnesia

Steve:

of. Oh well you know what? Since this guy didn't

Steve:

punch Damian in the face. Yeah green light. Dan,

Steve:

you were wrong for kind of for how you were

Steve:

treating him and for not listening to him and for

Steve:

not talking to him. I'll give you that. Dan should

Steve:

have maybe approached him differently but then to

Steve:

just be like well since he didn't commit felony

Steve:

assault at the party, why don't you bang my ex

Steve:

stepsister? Not ex stepsister. My stepsister ex.

Leif:

Seems Lily find out uh, we haven't even gotten her

Leif:

reaction to Rufus putting him up in this.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah.

Leif:

They'Re not going to tell her.

Steve:

They just dress him up like a butler whenever she

Steve:

comes over. She'll never recognize him.

Leif:

There's no reason for her to actually go to the

Leif:

loft.

Steve:

So uh, yeah.

Leif:

Errik comes home to find Rufus waiting for him.

Leif:

Rufus gets Eric to open up about how lonely he has

Leif:

been.

Steve:

It wasn't Jenny. You know Rufus really when it's

Steve:

like no, we're not done here. Talk to me. It was a

Steve:

very good dad moment. He still let him go a little

Steve:

too soon where uh, his things like that kind of

Steve:

guy always does like he kind of like definitely

Steve:

fucked it up at the end with that line because

Steve:

it's like yeah Eric, no one will ever actually

Steve:

love you. Just people who will pretend to to get

Steve:

something from you is what Eric is hearing when he

Steve:

says that.

Leif:

Yeah.

Steve:

I also thought that this was one of the best

Steve:

scenes that Eric has that Conor has done.

Leif:

Chuck is surprised when Reina shows up the Empire

Leif:

suite. Blair called Reyna and convinced her to

Leif:

give Chuck a second chance. Chuck agrees to keep

Leif:

Reyna out of his attempts to preserve his father's

Leif:

legacy. And Reyna leaves for a meeting and Chuck

Leif:

texts Blair a thank you again.

Steve:

This was just as dumb like oh yeah, but it's fine.

Steve:

I'm so mad at you. But uh, Blair said that you're

Steve:

cool so it's fine. Why are they even talking.

Leif:

At W? Blair is anxiously waiting for Epperly to

Leif:

get out of her meeting with Stefano to learn her

Leif:

fate. However, Epperly comes out of her meeting

Leif:

and reveals that after spending the night talking

Leif:

to her old boyfriend, she decided to quit and do

Leif:

Eat, Pray, Love with him in Bali. Not only that,

Leif:

but she recommended that Blair replace her. Blair

Leif:

is shocked as, uh, she is also a full time

Leif:

student.

Steve:

Yeah, it's funny, uh, it took me back to what you

Steve:

were saying about how they're going to slowly back

Steve:

away from college. And now here you have Blair

Steve:

being assistant to a CEO of, uh, this company. Or

Steve:

I guess the, uh, editor. The editor of this

Steve:

magazine. As a full time student. As a full time

Steve:

student who has been an intern, you know, no one

Steve:

else.

Leif:

Like a week.

Steve:

Yeah, for like a week. None of the other people

Steve:

who have been working at this company.

Leif:

She was fired last week too.

Steve:

Yes, yes, fired last week and probably going to be

Steve:

this week if things didn't turn out differently.

Steve:

No, yeah, yeah. Just let this, uh, let this newbie

Steve:

take over. I wonder if, if Emerly was like, you

Steve:

know what, I'm going to teach her to that. She's

Steve:

not right for this. I'm going to get her fired now

Steve:

so that she can find something else to do.

Leif:

Or are they just making fast tracking Blair to

Leif:

being a powerful woman so she can go back to

Leif:

Chuck.

Steve:

Mhm. Which, that feels a little too on the nose,

Steve:

which is kind of what we do here.

Leif:

Russell asks Raina if he still has her support in

Leif:

buying Bass Industries. She responds only on the

Leif:

condition of keeping Chuck on as part of the new

Leif:

company.

Steve:

I liked Russell's reaction, like, I don't need

Steve:

him. She's like, you do. You just don't know it

Steve:

yet. Which also was dumb.

Leif:

Really don't need him.

Steve:

I didn't hear you.

Leif:

You really don't need him.

Steve:

Yeah, you really don't. And it is dumb. But the

Steve:

way that she's like, you do, you just don't know

Steve:

it yet. What I liked about it was Russell's

Steve:

reaction. I like this relationship where you have

Steve:

a dad that listens to his kid. You have a dad that

Steve:

listens to his daughter. This, uh, novel

Steve:

introduction that this show has brought is this

Steve:

parent showing care and concern and listening to

Steve:

their daughter and taking her advice and seeing

Steve:

what she can really bring to the table.

Leif:

Dan and Nate stroll out of Damian's building and

Leif:

see him returning home. They say they came looking

Leif:

for Eric but found Damian's dad instead. They told

Leif:

him everything. A distraught Damian watches them

Leif:

walk away.

Steve:

Bruh, you've been dealing designer Drugs.

Leif:

On.

Steve:

The Upper east side for at least two years now.

Steve:

Let's say he started like a month before he met

Steve:

Jenny. At least a year. You have been dealing high

Steve:

end drugs to high end clientele and you didn't set

Steve:

any of that aside. You didn't think like, oh, I'll

Steve:

have this money for me away from my dad at any

Steve:

point.

Leif:

It seems like he was strictly street level. So he

Leif:

was probably just basically earning a little bit

Leif:

and enough to buy his own drugs.

Steve:

Yeah, maybe. Yeah. Just feel like he could have

Steve:

done something with some of the money he was

Steve:

getting to not be completely cut off from his dad.

Steve:

But also good for you, Damien.

Leif:

And Serena and Ben do some reconnecting. Gross.

Steve:

Gross. I just wanted to kiss you like I wanted to

Steve:

back when you were 16 and in my classroom. Fucking

Steve:

disgusting. And ah.

Leif:

This is Gust of Crow's closing monologue. They say

Leif:

the universe has a great sense of humor. That

Leif:

sometimes having your dreams come true can feel

Leif:

like a nightmare. Because getting what you want

Leif:

always comes with strings attached. And even when

Leif:

you think you're finally in the clear, you're

Leif:

never home free. Every happy ending is just a new

Leif:

beginning. Because on the Upper east side, the

Leif:

good times never last forever. Xoxo, uh, Gossip

Leif:

Girl. That is our episode. What is coming up next?

Steve:

Ben and Serena is coming up next, and that's going

Steve:

to be just annoying and disgusting and they're

Steve:

going to be like a thing now for sure. I'm worried

Steve:

about Eric. I'm worried about Eric needing a

Steve:

return to the Ostrov center at some point because

Steve:

he is carrying a lot and has no friends. I would

Steve:

really like Dan to swoop in here and be the big

Steve:

brother friend that Eric needs. I'm not confident

Steve:

he's going to. This Chuck and Reina thing is gonna

Steve:

bounce back and forth and it's gonna annoy me, I'm

Steve:

sure. But again, I like Reina and I like the Chuck

Steve:

Reyna couple. I don't like how, what is it, two or

Steve:

three episodes in a row? It's like you let

Steve:

business get in the way of things and now you're

Steve:

letting personal things get in the way. And now

Steve:

it's like, oh, but now we just promise not to

Steve:

anymore. Like, didn't you promise this last week?

Steve:

Didn't the two of you have this same resolution a

Steve:

week ago and maybe even the week before that too?

Steve:

Like, I feel like you've already had the whole

Steve:

this plot two weeks in a row. And yeah, I mean, I

Steve:

think that some walls are going to Cave in around

Steve:

Lily and Rufus. I think that they have grown up

Steve:

things to fight about now, which I kind of like,

Steve:

because when they had tension before, it was dumb

Steve:

kid drama, like, how many people did you bang? But

Steve:

now they actually have some grown up shit that

Steve:

might come crashing down on them. So will.

Leif:

Will he go to jail?

Steve:

I can't imagine. I can't. I can't imagine that. I

Steve:

can imagine her getting arrested. Cannot imagine

Steve:

her going to jail.

Leif:

Did you notice the parallel between Dan and Blair?

Steve:

Which. What was going on?

Leif:

Well, Dan is clearly propping up Ben and Serena,

Leif:

and Blair is propping up Chuck.

Steve:

Chuck and Raina. Yes. No, I did see that. That.

Steve:

That, uh, you're. I. I thought you meant parallels

Steve:

throughout the episode, but at the end where. Yes,

Steve:

you have Blair pushing those two together. Dan

Steve:

pushing those two together, leaving Dan and Blair

Steve:

on the outs.

Leif:

They're going to be one intern short at W now.

Steve:

They. Oh, they sure are. Are they gonna need new

Steve:

India? Uh, a new writer intern.

Leif:

Any other predictions?

Steve:

Kind of curious if this is it for Damien, at least

Steve:

for a while, because I feel like he could kill.

Steve:

Still bounce back. But no, I don't think that. I

Steve:

don't think. I think that's it.

Leif:

Let's get into segments. Hello there. Peabody

Leif:

here. And this is the Wayback Machine for

Leif:

traveling through time.

Steve:

And this is my boy.

Leif:

German.

Steve:

Speak German.

Steve:

Hello.

Steve:

Good boy.

Leif:

This week in fandom, we jumped in the wayback

Leif:

Machine to travel to The Forums from 2011 Overall

Leif:

Impression Television without pity said it was

Leif:

horrible. Fan form was slightly more positive.

Steve:

Yeah, it wasn't great.

Leif:

Blair's promotion makes no sense.

Steve:

None. None whatsoever.

Leif:

They're desperate for Damian to stay.

Steve:

Yeah, I kind of. I kind of hope that he's not

Steve:

done. I kind of want to see where this goes for

Steve:

him because now Damian's gonna actually need a

Steve:

fucking friend. And now does he go back to Eric

Steve:

and like, I'm so sorry, but I need rich friends.

Steve:

I'm cut off and I'm only allowed to live in my

Steve:

house on the lake back in Wales.

Leif:

Belgium.

Steve:

Belgium.

Leif:

It's hard to even care about Serena anymore.

Steve:

It is hard to even care about Serena anymore. I'd

Steve:

like to high five everyone in that comment chain.

Steve:

I loved Serena so much for so long that I really,

Steve:

for three years, just was on the Serena ride of

Steve:

like, oh, I kind of get it. I kind of get it.

Steve:

Until finally it's like, what an asshole.

Steve:

What are you doing?

Leif:

Top of their dad at the end of season three, just

Leif:

kill their character.

Steve:

Yes, completely and even the lead up.

Leif:

To it, like, trip stuff too, is pretty bad.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah, the, the trip stuff was pretty bad.

Steve:

And I was still like, uh, kind of on board for her

Steve:

at the time because I still felt like. Because I

Steve:

do feel at the heart of it. Serena is a, I don't

Steve:

want to say naive, but she's so easy to take

Steve:

advantage of if you are coming from a very

Steve:

specific angle of being older, being parental and

Steve:

being, I don't know, just telling her the five

Steve:

things that she needs to hear in a day. You know,

Steve:

tell her that she's pretty. Tell her that it's

Steve:

just all of those Serena things which she's so

Steve:

hard to care about anymore. Like I put so much in

Steve:

season one alone. No, I'm. I can't care.

Leif:

So Television Without Pity and fan form were very

Leif:

divided on their views of Ben tells you without

Leif:

pity. Still. Definitely side eyeing him. M. But

Leif:

fan forum was like sympathetic towards him.

Steve:

I love the Gossip Girl fans, but sometimes I hate

Steve:

the Gossip Girl fans in the fan forums. Like, this

Steve:

guy is disgusting. He went to jail. Okay, so he

Steve:

did not do the one thing, but he did the other,

Steve:

right? He goes to jail for this and then spends

Steve:

his time in jail trying to destroy a woman, a

Steve:

girl's life, a, uh, high school and early college

Steve:

girl's life. And then is like, oh, uh, but she

Steve:

didn't mean it. Oh, it wasn't her. Okay, now I

Steve:

love you. Fuck off, you pervert groomer.

Leif:

Chuck can't carry a storyline.

Steve:

No, no, I'm hoping Raina can carry a storyline,

Steve:

but Chuck can't.

Leif:

And while it's insulting that the show trots out

Leif:

the frigid career woman trope, sex is a great

Leif:

stress relief. And Nate sure does look like a

Leif:

really cute bike.

Steve:

It's like riding a really cute bike. I forgot

Steve:

about that line.

Leif:

And uh, this was an actual quote from user rue721.

Leif:

Don't you understand that Rufus sold you down the

Leif:

river? Dan, where's your mother? Call her to get

Leif:

her to scream at Rufus. Because right now she's

Leif:

still trying to clean up the psychic splatter that

Leif:

Rufus made out of the ambitious but level headed

Leif:

season one Jenny. And I'm sure she doesn't want

Leif:

him to ruin you too.

Steve:

Facts, no lies detected. And also, if you think

Steve:

about it, like, where is she? Here. Like you had

Steve:

who move in with our kid in our loft?

Leif:

She just doesn't know.

Steve:

She doesn't know because Dan doesn't talk to him.

Leif:

Now Eric needs a hug.

Steve:

Oh, Eric.

Leif:

Chuck without Bart is boring.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

And fan for him because we got a second James

Leif:

Franco reference in a couple weeks. Thinks that he

Leif:

is coming to Gossip Girl and that him and Blair

Leif:

would be hot.

Steve:

Oh, and I don't really give a shit about James

Steve:

Franco kind of way, I guess. Could we get his

Steve:

younger brother? Can we get his more talented,

Steve:

less rapey younger brother?

Leif:

Well, that is it for, uh, this week in fandom.

Leif:

Let's move over to episode grades. It's my turn to

Leif:

go first. Yeah. Not a very good episode. I think

Leif:

the only thing that keeps it from being an effort

Leif:

D minus was probably Florence's machine. Yeah.

Leif:

Because she has one of the most beautiful voices

Leif:

ever.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

Ah. So I ended up with a D. Yeah.

Steve:

I thought it was really rough. I thought so many

Steve:

of the plot resolutions, the climax to this

Steve:

episode, every climax failed and it was just a

Steve:

dud. Even the sex line climax failed. So how's

Steve:

that? It was just such a dud in the end. I'm going

Steve:

to go a D plus. I'll give it just that plus

Steve:

because I didn't hate it as much as that one I

Steve:

hated the other week.

Leif:

Moving over to Stockwatch. Going up. I had Ben,

Leif:

because even though he's. Even though he's gross,

Leif:

he's getting what he wants. I guess.

Steve:

So.

Leif:

Yeah. He's going up. Serena, same thing. Blair,

Leif:

because even though she really showed her

Leif:

privilege and is the definition of failing upward.

Steve:

Yes.

Leif:

So. But she did fail upward.

Steve:

Yes, she did.

Leif:

Chuck and Reina, because they seem to be getting

Leif:

on. And Chuck finally kind of wander over Apparely

Leif:

because she gets to be happy and stress free now.

Leif:

Gets to go to Bali and just chill for a while.

Steve:

Yeah, yeah.

Leif:

And Rufus, because he was. Other than, you know,

Leif:

the whole moving Dan and he was. He was a good dad

Leif:

to, uh, Eric. I thought at the end there. Who do

Leif:

you have going up?

Steve:

Ben as well. Ben, who is, you know, now getting

Steve:

Serena after getting out of jail again. I'm going

Steve:

to give Blair for, as you said, failing upwards

Steve:

and getting her promotion. I'm going to give Chuck

Steve:

and Raina, as you had said, for their coming

Steve:

together. I am not as I'm leaving Rufus neutral.

Steve:

I'm not going to give him the up because. Yes. Uh,

Steve:

I like how he was with Eric at the end, but I felt

Steve:

like the stuff with. With Ben kind of offset. I

Steve:

think that might be it for me. Going up. Oh, I'm

Steve:

sorry. Epperly. Everly was the other one. I wanted

Steve:

to go up.

Leif:

Going down. I had Damian because he Got cut off,

Leif:

broke. Dan because his scheme failed.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

Eric because he's. He failed. And then he's alone

Leif:

and bruised hand and not looking good.

Steve:

Yeah.

Leif:

Nate, uh, because he got used and didn't even get

Leif:

weight out of it.

Steve:

No.

Leif:

And Russell because his. His daughter went against

Leif:

him and didn't show up for the beating. So he went

Leif:

down.

Steve:

All right, all right. I have the same as you

Steve:

without Russell. I was also keeping Russell

Steve:

neutral because I appreciated the daughter. The

Steve:

daddy daughter moment there at the end and how he

Steve:

treated her. And even when he was like

Steve:

disappointed in her earlier, he was. He didn't

Steve:

like come down on her. You know, he didn't Rufus

Steve:

her. I. So I'm going to let him stay neutral. I,

Steve:

uh. But the. The rest of who you said yes, I had

Steve:

all going down. Uh, Damien, Dan, Eric, Nate for

Steve:

being played and not played, not laid. And yeah, I

Steve:

think that would be it for my going to Vanessa

Steve:

wasn't mentioned, right?

Leif:

No.

Steve:

But here's the best outfits from the last episode

Steve:

we've seen.

Leif:

Best outfit. I had Reina again with her purple

Leif:

dress in the epilogue.

Steve:

I was torn between Reyna's purple dress in the

Steve:

epilogue and the red dress from dinner. I thought,

Steve:

uh, Reina just looked fantastic in this whole

Steve:

episode. Pretty much. So I also had Reina.

Leif:

Which one that I'm, uh, going to.

Steve:

Go with the red one. The first one. Honorable

Steve:

mention to, uh, Blair's dress. It was a little

Steve:

busy from what I usually like, but I thought it

Steve:

was interesting. Busy. But I really liked how

Steve:

elegant the red with the black necklace look.

Leif:

That is it for segments. Do you have anything

Leif:

you'd like to plug?

Steve:

Where are we in December right now? Have we hit

Steve:

the ninth yet?

Leif:

Uh, I believe it's going to be the next day.

Steve:

Okay, well, tomorrow I will be at the Christmas

Steve:

Village in Love park in Philadelphia. It's right

Steve:

there off of Dilworth Park. So come on down, catch

Steve:

me playing some tunes. I'll be there at six o'

Steve:

clock tomorrow and on Thursday I'll be back again

Steve:

at five o' clock in the evening. So come in some

Steve:

Christmas songs, some, uh, original songs, some

Steve:

cover songs, and come in and have a, uh, nice

Steve:

time. Oh, and then December 27th, I am at Fat Lady

Steve:

Brewing in Manayunk. So. And then you can follow

Steve:

me on TikTok or Instagram. Steve Marshon M A R C H

Steve:

I O N For me, you can.

Leif:

Follow me on instagram @blueSky Hotcapicola.

Leif:

That's hot. C A P I C O L A You can follow the

Leif:

podcast on Instagram, TikTok and threads on

Leif:

judging breakfast pod. And if you would like to

Leif:

sign up for our Patreon, our Discord server or our

Leif:

subreddit, you can find the links on our website

Leif:

nonjudgingbreakfastpod.com and if.

Steve:

You'D like to get in touch with us, we would love

Steve:

to hear what you have to say. Please go ahead and

Steve:

send uh us an email and we will read it here on

Steve:

the podcast and let you know our thoughts. And

Steve:

while you're at it, also if you could hit the like

Steve:

subscribe follow button to whatever it is you are

Steve:

listening to us on and even leave us a comment. It

Steve:

really helps our visibility especially in Spotify

Steve:

and Apple podcasts. And finally, if you could make

Steve:

us your water cooler talk, let your friends know

Steve:

what you're listening to, tell them all about the

Steve:

non judging breakfast pod and pull them a uh seat

Steve:

up to the non judging breakfast table with.

Leif:

You and we'll be back next week to talk about

Leif:

season 4 episode 15 it girl happened one night the

Leif:

episode description reads. With Russell Thorpe

Leif:

poised for a takeover attempt of Bass Industries,

Leif:

Chuck makes one last ditch effort to save his

Leif:

family's company.

Steve:

Oh boy.

Leif:

I will also reveal it is Valentine's Day next

Leif:

week.

Steve:

Oh Jesus Christ. Is this going to end with Chuck

Steve:

and Reyna being like but we're going to make sure

Steve:

not to let business interfere with our

Steve:

relationship again for the third week in a row.

Leif:

Well, we shall see. But until next time, you know

Leif:

you love us.

Steve:

XOXO Every time you walk away run.

Steve:

Away you take a piece of m me with you there Every

Steve:

time you walk away or run away you take a piece of

Steve:

me with you there Every time you walk away or run

Steve:

away you take a piece of me with you there oh it

Steve:

seems I'm walking right to your door.

Steve:

My heart's.

Steve:

Still resting looking for something more.

Steve:

Are.

Steve:

You ever gonna see everything you mean to me I'm

Steve:

trying really hard to.

Steve:

Believe.

Steve:

Every time you walk away or run away you take a

Steve:

piece of me with you there. Every time you walk

Steve:

away or run away you take a piece of me with you

Steve:

there Every time you walk away or run away you

Steve:

take a piece of me with you there Never feels

Steve:

right when I'm out here on my own.

Leif:

I.

Steve:

Left last night and it feels like way too long.

Steve:

Are you ever gonna see everything you mean to me

Steve:

I'm trying really hard to believe. Every time you

Steve:

walk away run away you take a piece of meat with

Steve:

you there every time you walk away run away you

Steve:

take a piece of me with you there every time you

Steve:

walk away or run away you take a piece of me with

Steve:

you there.

Steve:

Come back to me.

Steve:

Smile and you'll make my life complete. Every time

Steve:

you walk away or run away you take a piece of me

Steve:

with you there every time you walk away or run

Steve:

away you take a piece of me with you there ah.

Steve:

Every time you walk away or run away you take a

Steve:

piece of me m with you there every time you walk

Steve:

away or run away you take a piece of me with you

Steve:

there every time you walk away or run away you

Steve:

take a piece of me with you there every time you

Steve:

walk away or run away you take a piece of me with

Steve:

you there every time you walk away or run away you

Steve:

take a piece of me with you there every time you

Steve:

walk away or run away you take a piece of me with

Steve:

you there.

Next Episode All Episodes Previous Episode

About the Podcast

Show artwork for Non Judging Breakfast Pod
Non Judging Breakfast Pod
A Gossip Girl Podcast

Listen for free

Support Non Judging Breakfast Pod

A huge thank you to our supporters, it means a lot that you support our podcast.

If you like the podcast and want to support it, too, you can leave us a tip using the button below. We really appreciate it and it only takes a moment!
Support Non Judging Breakfast Pod
A
We haven’t had any Tips yet :( Maybe you could be the first!